Your Guide to Not Getting Murdered ... by Maureen Johnson & Jay Cooper (Tuesday Intros & Teaser Tuesday)

Title: Your Guide to Not Getting Murdered in a Quaint English Village

Author: Maureen Johnson 

Illustrator: Jay Cooper

Publication: 14 September 2021

Format: Hardcover

Amazon Description: 

A weekend roaming narrow old lanes, touring the faded glories of a country manor, and quaffing pints in the pub. How charming. That is, unless you have the misfortune of finding yourself in an English Murder Village, where danger lurks around each picturesque cobblestone corner and every sip of tea may be your last. If you insist on your travels, do yourself a favor and bring a copy of this little book. It may just keep you alive. 
Brought to life with dozens of Gorey-esque drawings by illustrator Jay Cooper and peppered with allusions to classic crime series and unmistakably British murder lore, Your Guide to Not Getting Murdered in a Quaint English Village gives you the tools you need to avoid the same fate, should you find yourself in a suspiciously cozy English village (or simply dream of going). Good luck! And whatever you do, avoid the vicar.

Ramble-y Teaserish Stuff

From time to time Amazon really gets me. Of course, they know my likes better than most, I suppose. My watchlist is full of things like Midsomer Murders, Marple, Agatha Raisin. My bookish wishlist is full of Agatha Christie, Robin Stevens, Regency mysteries, and, well, basically books where one might easily get murdered in a quaint English village.

When I saw Your Guide to Not Getting Murdered in a Quaint English Village on my recommendations I scoffed for a millisecond and then I clicked "Buy Now." 

This was not my planned post for today. It's a difficult one to do any sort of justice to and I really wasn't sure how I would pull off my typical graphic collage dealie for the teasers. The book I had planned ended up being such a bust that I only ranted on Goodreads about it ... and then I grabbed my Guide for a little mental health break. I've only read it five times or so since it arrived Friday evening. So far I've shared it with my bestie, one of my favorite co-workers, random people checking into the hotel who've seen it sitting next to me at the front desk ... and now, you. They've each only gotten a glimpse and so far everyone wants a copy. You, dear readers, get a couple of glimpses. 

I was originally going to try and eek out the entire opening note but there's not nearly enough room to make it all legible and, besides, you need this book. Trust me. The opening (and the ending -- and everything in between) is worth it. Go digital if you must, but this is one that should really be held. 

So that's the "Intro" out of the way. Then came the difficulty of what else to tease. It's broken down like a typical tourist guidebook. Where to go, who to see, what to do. Of course, since we're in a Quaint English Village, each comes with a warning. I decided to go with what would most likely be my first stop at the local Manor .... and, possibly, my last. 

I've never been very good at following directions.

THE LIBRARY

It's best not to pull books down at random. Things ... happen sometimes.

If you were closer, I might let you borrow the book. 

Briefly. 

While in my presence. 

Since you aren't, though, I highly recommend that you just get your own. 

Even the back cover points out that your life may depend on it.

"First Chapter First Paragraph Tuesday Intros" is from the first paragraph or two
of a book being read now (or in the future) and is hosted by Socrates' Book Reviews. 

"Teaser Tuesday" at The Purple Booker asks for a random line or two
from anywhere in the book currently being read.